I am 60 years old. I lowered my blood pressure, lost significant weight and size, got a lot healthier, and feel wonderful. You can do it if you want to - without joining, spending, subscribing, or suffering at all. I have nothing to sell except solid advice and my experience.

Eight months ago, I turned 60 and had a rough time with the birthday. My blood pressure was high, even with meds. I had gained 20 pounds the prior year, and I have never been a small woman. I had become totally sedentary. I mean like c-o-u-c-h-p-o-t-a-t-o, mashed.

My excuses - I lived in southern Mississippi for a year - a place so hot and humid that it sucked the energy out of me. I went from doing water aerobics twice a day in my own Florida pool to sitting in a recliner most of the time, miserable, lonely, and unhappy. I moved us home to Illinois, despite my husband’s dislike of Midwestern weather. Then, he got cancer, had surgery, lost his job. My depression worsened, but I proclaimed I wasn’t depressed.

And I sat. I’m a writer. I’m supposed to sit. I medicated with food. Sugary food. Salty food. Even healthy food. Often.

My grown kids were having issues and I wallowed in theirs rather than fixing my own. Issues? I had whole subscriptions.

An old lady’s road to healthy success

People have always told me I look way younger than my age. Last year, people stopped saying that. More likely, they’d ask was I feeling ok, and when was the last time I had a physical?.

I’d say, “I’m 60″ and wait for the “Oh, I’d never have guessed!”

I heard - “Yep.” No surprise - I looked 60 and more.

So.

• Husband survived and recovered nicely.
• Kids moved on in their lives - we all do. Their troubles got fixed. More troubles came. They handled them. They don’t require me to manage their lives.
• Weather here does not prevent activity.

I began to get a clue. I could live long and prosper, or not.

I talked in depth with my doctor about nutrition, dieting, medicating with food. She said food can keep you alive or kill you. Your choice. Dieting is temporary and fairly useless unless you want to be a yoyo.  But food can be managed long term without deprivation torture.

Every human being needs physical activity to make bowels function, hearts beat, blood flow, and cells regenerate. It doesn’t matter, for a 60 year-old everyday woman,  whether that activity is 15 minutes or two-hours a day. If I do it regularly, enjoy it, and work up a little sweat, I’m doing myself immeasurable benefit. I don’t have to measure up to Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, Oprah’s trainer, or any fitness guru. I only need to keep moving part of every day. Cool. I can do that.

But I like chocolate

I eat every food I enjoy, in normal portions. I learned I want to avoid, chemicals and poisons. I like close to nature foods. I seldom, seldom, seldom use artificial sweeteners except for a couple of hits of Truvia per week in a drink or a dessert. I drink pop once in a blue moon. I don’t add salt to anything. I avoid, but do not forbid myself sugar. I eat chocolate several times a week - almost always very dark chocolate (70% cacao or higher) and with portions controlled. An ounce, perhaps.

I had triple chocolate layer cake yesterday. I counted it in my food calculator. Worth every calorie, each bite a decadent pleasure. Over my tongue. Melting down my throat. Sweet flavor. Rich texture. I took a good wedge, gave my husband one, indulged, and gave the rest of the cake to my daughter’s family. No guilt. I don’t do guilt.

Today, I am enjoying light salads, steamed vegetables, and fresh fruit. I’m eating till I’m almost full, then I busy myself with something till I feel hungry, and do it all over.

I model my nutrition after the South Beach philosophy - their glycemic index makes sense to me - but anything that works for you is good. I am a terrific cook, and I cook Mediterranean style mostly, managing portions scrupulously.

This I know clearly -

Calories in - calories used = how much you weigh. It doesn’t matter if those calories are 100% chocolate, fat, sugar, or anti-oxidents, carbs, protein or cardboard. The math doesn’t lie. You don’t have to buy someone’s book or program to manage your health. Those things may motivate, but they are not magic.

Getting my ass off the couch

Knowing I had to get off that couch, I acknowledged the following:

1. I dislike sweating.
2. I am not cute in a leotard, nor do I feel comfortable strutting in one.
3. Pain is not my thing.

For me, the best thing is high-resistance water exercise. Advantaging a New Year’s promotion in the slumping health club industry, I joined my local club because they have three heated pools. They waived the hefty signup fee.  My life is worth the discounted $50 a month. I go three to five times a week and I work as hard in that pool as a football player in pre-season. I jog, I use dumbells, I swim, I stretch. I sweat, but who can tell when I’m in four feet of water?

• I ride a stationary bike while I watch Jeopardy, at least three times a week. It’s a 25 min workout that doesn’t bother my arthritis.
• I park my car at the back end of every parking lot.
• I store some everyday items on the second floor of my home. I go upstairs every time I need them, use them downstairs, and take them back up. I don’t send my kids or grandkids up to get anything I need.

I know this: If you increase your activity regularly and do not increase your food intake, you’ll lose weight gradually. You don’t need an exercise video. Don’t need to suffer. Just move. Sex helps, too. Good, safe, relationship sex.

Caring about yourself is a key

No matter how many resolutions I made or how much I worried about my health, nothing worked until I understood that:  I am at the last third or so of my time on Earth and I deserve to care about myself as much as I care about anyone else. If I don’t take care of me, I can’t take care of anyone else. If I don’t take care of me, no one else can.

I get in touch with my own needs, wants, and wishes.

• Can I babysit? You bet! I love those little kids. But I can’t do it every day, or for long hours. I can’t often do it without notice.
• Can I take a nap? Sure! And you can bet I’ll feel no guilt.
• I reserve the absolute right to say, “No”  to anything, anytime. No explanation required.
• I don’t negotiate my own truths, and I clearly know what they are.
• I love people, but not all people, and I’m not overly concerned about those who don’t like me. It’s unlikely I’ll  change greatly anymore - I have made many changes in myself over years, and I like who I am.
• Stress is natural and motivates us to accomplish. But stress must be managed and I am best at managing my own.
• I trust my health advisors and will do what they recommend as long as I understand all the ramifications.

What I learned and how it saved my life

I will never again be less than 60 and I have grown to be friends with that. I read somewhere that if you are alive in 2010, chances are you could live to well over 100 years old. A nice goal, I think.

Today, I went to see my doctor because I have an ugly, uncomfortable ear/sinus thing going on. Haven’t seen her in a year–since my last, rather distressing physical.

She said - “Wow! You look great! One of my youngest baby boomers!”

She took my blood pressure - remember, I’m sick with an infection and my BP is always higher in a doctor’s office. It was 120/78. I kid you not! Last reading was 148/90.

My weight has dropped by 20 pounds. My clothing size went down a whole size or more.

My heart rate was awesome. And last week, I had an eye exam.  That doctor said I have the organic eye-health of a 20 year-old. Last year? They saw floating protein gunk in my eyeball fluid and lectured me about diabetes risk.

Most days, I eat about 1500 calories. Maybe twice a week I am apt to go up to 2,000, and maybe once a month I’ll go all out and end up at 2500. I always use the next day to recover, reducing my food intake, increasing my non-sweet fluid intake, and being more physical.

I only sit at a computer or anywhere else for a max 90 min at a time. Then I get up - clean something, walk, run errands, or get active in some way before I go back to the sedentary activity.

I do things that make me smile or laugh - every single day. My grandkids are a big part of that, but so are friends, siblings, other family members, and online acquaintances.

I rest when I need to, thoroughly.

I meditate frequently and regularly with guided imagery tapes. They work extremely well for me.

I put all my troubles in two virtual buckets. A.) things I can fix and B.) things I can;t fix. I work through bucket (A) at a healthy once - recognizing my strengths and weaknesses. I reward myself for managing milestones from that bucket. (Rewards almost never involve food.) I let bucket (B) sit there and percolate. If it gets too full, I add another bucket. I spend a structure 15 minutes a week wallowing in worry about the contents, but I never take anything out of that bucket. The stuff will work itself into oblivion or into the other bucket when something has changed to permit me to handle an item.

I load my food program with anti-oxidents (who can resists blueberries, strawberries, great veggies?) healthy fats (oh yeah - give me those ripe avocados, premium olive oil, or well-prepared wild salmon!) I drink skim milk every day. I eat only foods that look, smell, and taste great. I fuss over our meals. We have selected several are restaurants that serve rational portions, don’t coat everything in salt, and really understand food preparation and cooking. I drink water all day long. I take an 80 gr aspirin a day and a multi-vitamin every other day because my Doc told me too.

I record everything I eat or drink almost every day. Probably five days a week - sometimes more. I do it scrupulously because lying to myself is pretty silly. I weigh myself sometimes, but not weekly and certainly not every day. I have found tracking weight monthly gives a realistic picture. Measuring myself, and paying attention to how my clothes fit and how I feel are much more meaningful than a number on a scale.

I don’t believe I will every be a slim woman. I never have been. Well, maybe once in 1967. I do believe a woman who is outside the recommended weights for her age can be healthy, happy, attractive, and can live long. I’m strong - I’ll take you on if you want me to! come on - Indian wrestle? Dance contest? Tug of war? I have good muscle tone - getting better. Great blood pressure. Healthy heart and a carotid scan showed less plaque than usual for my age. I’m happy, productive, talented, brilliant, healthy, and awesome as a friend or mentor. I love my own self.

And to think that I am practically an over night success! It only took me 60 years.

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Young women strive for excellence

The new year - lots of people have resolved to get healthy and fit. To keep up the momentum, we all need positive re-enforcement, and women are tempted to sneak a little treat, or a big one, like ice cream, chocolate, a bag of Oreos (hey, I was really good for two weeks!)You can choose from 14 ways to reward yourself without calories or guilt.

Set personal goals to demonstrate to yourself how much progress you’re making. Each time you reach a goal, reward yourself. Here’s a list of fourteen things you can give yourself that won’t sabotage your good intentions.

1. If it has to be food, find a healthy and fit recipe for a sumptuous dessert that isn’t loaded with calories.
2. Buy yourself a new handbag or tote bag. Always a cool feeling.
3. Go to a movie with a friend who absolutely shares your taste.
4. Buy some new music, slap on headphones, and listen to the album all the way through.
5. Buy a new sweater - bright, warm, and natural fabric.
6. Get a new coffee cup that’s 100% only for you. A big one.
7. Go out and play - find a venue that provides everything you need for an afternoon of noodling around. Our community has a little ceramic shop where you buy a piece, rent a table space, and paint your chosen item. They fire it and call you a few days later when it’s done.
8. Find a set of colored pencils, paint, or chalk and create something colorful.
9. Do the proverbial bubble bath with all the accoutrements.
10. Shut off the phones, lock the door and meditate or do creative visualization in total silence.
11. Put fresh flowers on your desk or work space or table. Bury your nose in them and breathe deeply.
12. Take a day off. Don’t work. Don’t clean. Don’t make calls. Rest. Relax.
13. Spend half a day in the park, reading a wonderful book.
14. Take a nap in silky pajamas.

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How to become a local politician - election advice

The doldrums of winter - a blah time for everyone once the holidays are gone, winter has set in, and chances are the kids have colds or are whiny. You have cabin fever. TV is a vast wasteland - and you don’t give rat’s patoot about Jay Leno, O’Brien, or Daly. Here’s my recipe for an instant spa in a pretty little tin - a way to feel better:

I got a sample tin of Clear Mind Balm from my Twitter friends at Badger Balm. They had me when I read the ingredients:

Extra virgin olive oil, beeswax, essential oils of lemon, rosemary, grapefruit, cardamom, calendula, rosehip, and ginger.

The tin is a beautiful warm pink shade and the aroma is deep and inspiring. The company advises that it’s for clarity and focus. They call it portable aroma therapy and that’s what it is. I used half a tin in about a week. I kept stroking it on my writs, sniffing, and saying, “Ahhhh.” You can try  Badger Balm Headache & Clear Mind Duet Set if you’re interested.

I used it on my cuticles - a continuous problem in the winter. I dabbed it under my nose and my three-year old grandson’s when we had the sniffles together.

What about the spa part?

Assemble a nice candle. A relaxation video or CD. I used a CD called Celtic Spirit Meditations - a true journey that took me out of my living room and into the Ages. Headphones. A cup of scented tea -  Ginger Lemon Grass Tea by The Republic of Tea?

Sit in a cozy, soft chair in a warm room.

Mix all the assembled ingredients to your taste and do what you will with them. After 30 minutes or so, you’ll feel like a new woman. Do it again tomorrow. Blessings on you.

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this is a reprint of an article I did for a couple of print publications. I thought the info so important I offer it to you here. Even if we’re all about health, we may neglect our eyes, and that’s crucial to your well-being. Ask your eye doctor some considered questions and learn the best way for you to manage vision correction.

Men don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses. Not true. Of men surveyed by Vision Council of America (VCA), 92% said women in fashionable eyewear are attractive. Women feel the same way about men in specs.

You can choose eyeglasses or contact lenses to bring vision back near 20/20 and it’s entirely possible to cure many seeing issues once thought to be permanent. Doctors can fix cataracts and glaucoma more effectively than ever before. Though there are vision problems that can’t be cured, many can be treated or arrested if caught early. Bottom line - beautiful eyes begin with healthy eyes.

Beauty comes from within

Eye docs say great nutrition and healthy lifestyle affect eyes and regular annual checkups is the way to go.

Essentials for protecting eyes:

1. Wear UV-blocking sun glasses all the time. Encourage children to do the same.
2. Use safety glasses anytime your eyes are at risk
3. Never let an unqualified person fit you with contact lenses - see a doctor.
4. Follow doctor’s instructions with contacts or eye solutions - to the letter.
5. Tell your doctor about any change in your vision.

Permanent vision repair

Don’t want glasses or lenses? You can consider Lasik surgery, laser-assisted, out-patient procedure that can repair vision for life.

Dr. George Thurber, MD, with the Center for Eye Care, Biloxi, MS says all Lasik isn’t the same. Equipment and process have improved. Expect to pay $1600 to $2000 per eye for top-quality, most insurance won’t cover it. But that price point ensures minimal risk of halo-vision, starburst images or other imperfections, once common. With computer-aided mapping of your eye and today’s lasers, 95% of patients have zero side effects and permanent correction.

Lasik is simple for the patient, says Thurber. A few seconds per eye, after initial consulting. You focus on a small red light - lasers painlessly remove microscopic cornea layers. Men and women, in general good health, from about age 18 to 70-something, are opting for Lasik, with great results.

How eyeware can help you express yourself

Some people prefer glasses. That can be a wonderful enhancement of your looks and personality statement. Frame design follows ready-to-wear clothing trends and nothing is more stylish than strutting your own stuff. New, surprising materials are on the scene. Everyone is accessorizing, according to Susan Martonik, spokesperson for VCA.

“The coolest thing is matching frames to fashion or function - a wardrobe of multiple pairs. It’s about eclectic individual style. Make a statement that’s all you,” she says.

Martonik sees women wearing flirty feminine frames for social or dress up events, chic designer frames for business and casual glasses everyday. Men choose stronger designs for rough sports, technologically enhanced eyewear like stylish safety glasses for on-the-job needs, and reds or brighter blues and sexier greys for social occasions.

Make your frames suit your face

If they don’t suit your face, frames won’t enhance your style. You could spend hours agonizing over every frame on those racks upon racks at the store, or you could go online and prescreen basic shapes and styles, right on your own face. Googling for “virtual eyeglass try on” will net you a number of options. Try framesdirect.com/framefinder for starters. You load a photo of yourself, then swap frames.

Experts say choices are almost unlimited and new frames come out every day. There’s a growing popularity with prescription sunglasses and designer frames for shades are another way to express yourself and perk up your look.

For some people, surgery doesn’t appeal and wearing glasses isn’t right either. Contact lenses are getting better and more comfortable than ever before. Lenses come in an array of colors and there are even special effects lenses. If you have the budget, they’re out there. Treat your eyes well - you don’t get second chances.

Take a moment to check out my guest post at HealMyPTSD.com for PTSD and Invisible Illness Awareness Week. I was invited to do a guest column because two of my family members are dealing with PTSD. It’s really tough to cope with an illness or condition that is invisible. There are physical symptoms, but often, people chalk those up to some other cause. HealMyPTSD is a valuable website by people who have knowledge and great concern.

While we’re at it, let’s visit some of my favorite posts over the years of compiling WomenDayByDay and Ontext:

A guest post from Thistle Farm, where women work to fix the hugely challenging problems in their lives. This one is terrific.

Women who read us honor their military loved ones for Memorial Day.

Proof that Jesus was a woman, and other funny stuff.

The courts are failing to help battered women.

22 ways to earn aliving at home - work at home

Basing marriage on positive thinking

Dr. Phil and the drunken teenage girls

Half dozen good ways for women to enter the blogsphere

Light therapy for pregnant women

There. That’s a little journey through the last few years of Women Day By Day. It’s rewarding to spend time digging up great information for my readers and empowering women to manage some of the things we face everyday. I’ve really loved finding guest writers to do a post here and there this year. Let me know if you know someone with something important, funny, or entertaining to tell us. Write me — maryan at ontext.com

My sister, Bonnie, got all fired up about a new book, actually a series of books, called Eat This Not That. These little books are one sneaky way for you to change your nutrition, and I am not kidding. I bought one of the books in the Eat This Not That series about a month ago and witnessed a miracle.
I bought Eat This Not That! Supermarket Survival Guide: The No-Diet Weight Loss Solution by David Zinczenko and Matt Goulding (Paperback - Dec 30, 2008). I spent a couple of hours reading it and found it amusing, informative and motivational. I wanted to go out and do what they recommended. So I did.

At the end of the book, which is a quick reading volume full of lists, bullets and quick tips, there is a one-week menu plan that covers lunches and dinners. It has a shopping list and recipes. Anything that makes one of my chores simpler is high on my list of yes items.

I copied the menu. Did the shopping - spent 30% less than I would generally spend. I followed the menus about 85% for a week. And I made my picky, finicky, nose-turned-up-at-anything-remotely-healthy spouse eat the food. I mean, what choice did he have?

So. He raved about every single meal. There’s the miracle. The menu plan is based on doing a bunch of prepping and cooking on Sunday, then combining planned left overs and fresh ingredients into new dishes all week. We went out to dinner twice during the week - moderate meals, both. He preferred the stuff I was making at home.

End result — he lost a couple of pounds without even being aware of it. I lost three. No sweat, no thinking, no obsessing. We ate great food, spent less money and enjoyed reading the book out loud at lunch each day.

It sneaked up on us and made some little, pleasant adjustments to how we eat. I’m headed out to the store to do yet another week of ideas from this series. My sister has passed the book to me, my son, her daughter and several friends. It’s almost a pandemic. And it’s very cool.

As empowerers of women, we’re interested in how PTSD recovery, or any health outcome, may be in our own hands. My family is intimately familiar with PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Some of our readers understand the condition, too, especially among the many military families following this column. Michele Rosenthal is an empathetic, informed, caring professional with excellent thoughts for us.

Healing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder: 5 Tips for Empowering Your Recovery

By Michele Rosenthal, Heal My PTSD

Let’s just get to the problem straight up: The single most challenging component of trauma and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is that horrible experience of powerlessness. During you trauma you feel it, and then for weeks or months or years afterward your PTSD struggle reinforces in every moment the idea that you are powerless to overcome. But is that really true?

Survivors are tough. They have, after all, survived something challenging. This means they have courage, determination, creativity and resources. The problem is that in the PTSD fog it’s easy to forget the innate capabilities you have to heal.

While all traumas are individual the PTSD experience is universal. Whether you survived a theater of war, violent sexual assault, childhood abuse, domestic violence, freak accident or medical drama the aftermath is the same: Functionally debilitating flashbacks, intrusive thoughts, insomnia, anxiety, rage, hyperarousal, hypervigilance and emotional numbing.

The good news is you are not destined to live this way forever. It is fundamentally possible to heal PTSD and go on to live a joyful, productive life. First, however, you need to take back your power. Healing begins and ends with your own ascension back to the powerdome. In healing this means taking control of the healing process, participating in it and being responsible for it.

The following five tips will jumpstart any mental health recovery process. As they focus on taking back your power both in your communication and connection with yourself and with those around you, these five actions will move you from a position of powerless to powerful.

1 - Intention: You can’t heal if your focus is scattered. It’s time to be very specific about your healing desire. This means approaching the healing journey methodically and with well planned outcomes. The more you imagine and plan your success the more you will become able to achieve it. What do you want? Be very specific in how you visualize the end result of your healing, plus each step you plan to take. Make a plan, follow through. Healing is like any other goal, it must be worked at with deliberate dedication.

2 - Education: Knowledge is power. The more you know about what ails you the more intentional you can be in fixing it. Understanding PTSD symptoms, how and why they function, plus what and when you need for healing helps you devise a better gameplan for action.

3 - Connection: Support during healing is key. PTSD recovery is a tough goal and you’ll need the support of yourself and others you can depend on. Building a support network can be a critical element in the healing process. This includes family, friends, colleagues and practitioners who are devoted to helping you evolve. You are strong, yes, and it’s always nice to have extra reserves of strength from those around you.

4 - Communication: Part of healing means being able to tell yourself and others what is wrong, why it is wrong, when it all went wrong, who was involved and how you feel. It’s tough to talk about trauma but healing begins and reaches deeper levels when you develop language and vocabulary. Communicating allows you to pinpoint what part of the PTSD process is really driving you; from there you can develop a plan for healing that is direct and effective.

5 - Commitment: PTSD healing doesn’t happen overnight. Despite the difficulties that ensue and the challenges that arise you must give 100% of yourself and never waver. There will be good days and bad ones but your oath to heal at all costs must remain strong. Doubt has no place in healing. You must commit to the idea and then follow through despite all obstacles.

The major crux of healing any mental illness lies in your ability to imagine a better self and then work hard to get there. By empowering your recovery with these easy steps you begin the process of placing the strategy and resources for healing squarely in your own lap - exactly where it should be. The brain likes to learn. Give it options. It wants new things to think and see and contemplate. Feed it with self-empowered healing thoughts and actions and you will heal, one day at a time.

Michele Rosenthal is a PTSD healing coach and the founder of Heal My PTSD, LLC, (www.healmyptsd.com), an organization that advocates for PTSD awareness, education, treatment and self-empowered healing. She is a licensed practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming.

(photo was provided)